It’s an odd title I know. What can possibly be good about bipolar disorder? Well, absolutely nothing when you’re in the depths of depression or spinning around manically. But there can be great benefits from having an illness, including a mental illness, and there are some that I’ve found in my life from having bipolar.
- I’ve learned how to say no. If you are good at something, like work, then people ask you to do more. It builds up over time. I’ve learnt to say no. I can’t. I have bipolar. Sorry.
- I don’t worry about what I’m going to wear, and I don’t have to keep track of my clothes cycle. I don’t care what I’m going to eat for dinner, whether I need a bigger television or a new car. If I didn’t have bipolar these things might continue to consume me as they once did.
- My marriage is far stronger today than it would have been if I didn’t have bipolar. Apparently 90% of marriages where one partner has bipolar end in divorce. That is truly tragic and saddening. My wife had lots of reasons to leave me when I was ill for prolonged periods, but she stayed even though she didn’t understand what was wrong with me. Her perseverance has been a blessing to our marriage.
- I have great relationships with my kids and time with them is invaluable. Unfortunately most Dads don’t spend more than a few minutes a day giving their kids undivided attention. Learning that I had bipolar was a good wake-up call. I now spend more time on things that are important to me.
- I’ve slowed down a lot. I stopped wearing a watch some years ago and haven’t missed it. Losing track of time rarely causes problems; if I’m 10 or 15 minutes late for the doctor, it doesn’t matter. He works to the same system anyway.
- I take my physical health more seriously than I used to. I’m frustrated by my lack of action on exercise, but I’m thinking about physical health every day, even when its hard to follow through with action.
- I’ve always been very open about having a mental illness, and I’ve actually never felt the stigma that is so widespread. I’m fortunate in that respect. When I converted to Christianity about 20 years ago I lost most of my good friends who had an issue with it. Since I’ve been telling people that I have bipolar I’ve gained at least the same number. Go figure.
- I’ve learned to be thankful for what I have and not yearn for what I don’t.
- The best thing must be the ability to empathize with others who are facing the same problems.
- I was once very guarded with what I said, often checking myself from saying anything that could offend or impact a person’s view of me. I’ve really lightened up and feel liberated. I’m rarely inappropriate (except when ill), but even if I am, I sense that nobody really cares.
-
In the Bible, in Romans 5:3-4 it says:
“We rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” - Being engaged with the world is good. I think more deeply about things like inequality, poverty, the environment and mental illness. (The downside of course is feeling let down by those in positions of power who continually fail us.)
- Life is absurd. My life is absurd. I’ve learned to laugh at both.
We have some friends who for many years had a very, very messy house. 3 young girls – cooking, dress-ups, paint, craft, clothes, toys – you know the rest. They would unashamedly invite friends over for meals, joking that they offered an important service to other parents. It helped their friends feel better about their own messy houses.
In a similar vein I found this in another blog:
“When you’re mentally ill you are constantly doing social work just by existing. I realize that often, when you’re crazy you actually need social services for yourself, but just by talking about yourself to people who aren’t feeling that great about themselves, you are able to instantly make them feel glad they aren’t you. That’s a great service to offer.”
A final word is that I definitely don’t have it all together, and I still have episodes now and then – although less severe – in both directions. I didn’t write this post to give a different impression, but just to put some ideas out there for looking at illness from a different angle.
Anneka Weston 24 Jul 2007 @ 4:21 am
hi from another bi polar Christian. Dont know how people cope in life with out Jesus. have met a number of bi polar Christians through my work for MDF there must be quite a few of us. Enjoyed reading your thoughts.
Thanks
Anneka
Finding Optimism - World of Psychology 5 Aug 2007 @ 4:22 pm
[...] The list is compiled at the great new blog Finding Optimism. Among the positive views is the entry 12 Best Things About Being Mentally Ill. Check it out. Time. I now spend more time on things that are important to me. Example – I have [...]
Greta 6 Aug 2007 @ 8:38 pm
It’s nice to hear someone say something good about bipolar for once… not that it’s a party…it’s not, but I certainly wouldn’t be the person I am today if I had been born without this illness. If I had the chance to live my life again, I would choose for bipolar to be a part of it, despite that pain that comes with the package. Thanks for the article, I really enjoyed it.
-Greta
http://goodtherapy.org
Diana 21 Aug 2007 @ 9:23 pm
I think mental illnesses are ways that we react to the world around us when it conflicts with who we are and how we perceive things at a given time. They are opportunities to grow and realize we are all uniquely powerful and that there is beauty to be found in almost anything. From all darkness comes light.
CiderJack 23 Aug 2007 @ 3:10 pm
“Yes.” She nodded. “The paranoids — actually paranoiac schizophrenics — would function as the statesman class; they’d be in charge of developing political ideology and social programs — they’d have the overall world view. The simple schizophrenics…” She pondered. “They’d correspond to the poet class, although some of them would b e religious visionaries — as would be some of the Heebs [hebephrenics]. The Heebs, however would be inclined to produce ascetic saints, whereas the schizophrenics would produce dogmatists. Those with Polymorphic schizophrenia simplex would be the creative members of the society, producing the new ideas.” She tried to remember what other categories might exist. “There could be some with over-valent ideas, psychotic disorders that were advanced forms of milder obsessive-compulsive neurosis, the co-called diencephalic disturbances. Those people would be the clerks and office holders of the society, the ritualistic functionaries, with no original ideas. Their conservatism would balance the radical quality of the poly-morphic shcizophrenics and give the society stability.”
Mageboon said, “So one would think the whole affair would work.” He gestured. “How would it differ from our own society on Terra?”
-Philip K. Dick, Clans of the Alphane Moon
Newt Stremple 12 Sep 2007 @ 3:20 am
Hey – thanks for making me not feel so alone. I have friends and family who love me and are great at supporting me, but there’s nothing like hearing from other people who know what this is like. I’m working on a zine called Not the Only Crazy about depression and this site is going to be a huge resource.
Joylene 17 Sep 2007 @ 9:02 pm
I really appreciate your input about bipolar. I’ve also known same amazingly beautiful artists with bipolar — they have added so much beauty to this world…
Julian the Apostate 29 Dec 2007 @ 1:08 am
Artists!? ARTISTS!!?? I would give anything right now to NOT have ANY “artistic” so-called skills AT ALL. They are NOT WANTED and NOT PRACTICAL and NOT NEEDED!!
I’d rather have something PRACTICAL!!!!!
Oh big DEAL I string BEADS and tinker with a jeweller’s saw and make stupid TRINKETS!!
WHOOP DEE DOO!!
I was talking to my brother today, he just passed the test to be hired as a power-plant worker, and as he was telling me about the things he’d be able to do if he got hired…buy a house and all…I cried and cried and CRIED!!
This “artistic” CRAP has gotten me NOWHERE in 20 YEARS and I HATE IT!!!
ARTISTS!! Go away!! :( :( :(
(crying)
G 18 Mar 2008 @ 9:16 am
I enjoyed reading the “12 Things…”. I think you point at important positive aspects and I would especially agree with the “others” and “concern” part. Though there’s the other side of the coin: it can be quite overwhelming to be so sensitive to what others are often not even close to see.
I am not bipolar but “just” depressive, and I really hope for a day when I can feel the warmth of just one ray of light on me again. Choose a life with depression over one without it? C’mon. Maybe a couple of months to experience a different, darker side of life. No, this suffering is no way to live. It is the light at the end of the tunnel that makes it worth fighting.
tg 19 May 2008 @ 10:19 pm
I really appreciated this post: “12 best best things about…”
I can relate to to insights gained and mixed blessings from living with bipolar II. Liked the humor in the last one about “performing social work just by existing.”
This is a positive website!
tg 19 May 2008 @ 10:31 pm
Really appreciated this post. Can relate to insights gained and “mixed blessings” of coping with bipolar II. Liked the humor at the end about “performing social work by just existing.” :-)
Jan Prejbisz 9 Sep 2008 @ 6:25 pm
From the other side:
My mother is bipolar.
The best thing you can do (especially if you’re a teenager) is move away for a while but keep sporadic contact.
My relationship with my mother improved by several orders of magnitude after 6 months away from “home” and almost no contact.
After living with “normal” people it became clear to me that I wasn’t the mental one.
Never question your sanity based on the assertions of your parents.
No matter how sure they seem.
I now keep in regular contact with my mother and realise that if she cries down the phone at me she is in a dip and that I should call back in a few days to assuage the guilt she will undoubtedly be feeling, and reassure her that I am alright and that she is alright.
If you have any views on the above post please let me know @ janprejbisz@gmail.com as this is the first time I’ve put any of this into written form.
Sincerely,
Jan Prejbisz.
BH 26 Sep 2008 @ 8:17 am
Thanks for the article. I agree with everything you are saying and have gone through the ups and downs of bipolar and the various sundry treatments to make life a bit more stable. I also agree with the scripture qouted about perseverence building character and character building hope. Having been through tough times, suicide attempts, depressive and manic episodes makes for an interesting life. But it is a life with experiences that has made me stronger and able to help others by just being me.
Doug 24 Dec 2008 @ 7:18 pm
Very nicely thought out. I am a much richer person for the things that I’ve been thru — and continue to go thru. Thanks for the perspective.
No 5 Jan 2009 @ 10:06 pm
I agree with the Artist comment from Julian. This is not a good era to be an artist. You can’t support yourself by using your talents. You end up taking demeaning jobs that don’t allow you the time to even practice art in your spare time, because you have either no spare time or no money to buy supplies. It’s enough to make somebody want to curse god for giving them a useless, impractical talent and no opportunity to do anything with it.
Lynda 2 Jun 2009 @ 5:53 am
Great post. I don’t have bi-polar (I have chronic depression) but I grew up with a mother who did. She was wild and wacky and I miss her so much. Sure, there were extreme down times and her anger could be like Katrina blowing through your life, but what a childhood I had. She’d take us for walks at midnight and told me the moon followed me around cause I was special. She’d laugh and laugh and make each of our days brighter. She was always for the underdog and me.. being a 60′s child, usually got out-done by my own mother when it came to getting out and trying to change the world. How weird was it going to protest meeting and finding your mother there!
All the best to all of you. We are all unique and special and I have found in my long life that it just isn’t black and white, we all have such greatness in us.
Debby 4 Jun 2009 @ 4:36 am
I love being a bi-polar artist/writer who can best be described as creativity with feet, but I also understand the longing to be able to do the simple things in life like being able to count on myself and my mood. Sometimes I can’t even notice that my house is a disaster let alone figure out where to start to clean it. But this is how God made me. Good for the people who can do a tedious nine to five. I am not one of them. Good for the people who can eat sugar and stop at one cookie. I am not one of them either. But we have so many wonderful things to offer. I love us!!!!!
kathbc 6 Jul 2009 @ 1:46 pm
Just to let you know, my husband is bi polar, and has done quite well artistically – he creates art from wood. At the moment he is building wooden chests for our children, then he will make new beds for them. He finds that when he is manic he plans what he will make this is his design phase. When he is feeling within the ‘normal’ range he goes over his designs, tweeks them and cuts the wood, when he is depressed is the perfect time for sanding and doing the little tedious things which don’t require too much energy, but still give him a sense of achievement.
He doesn’t do full time work well for long – a year is about what he manages, but the things he creates are valuable and saleable and bring in a little money at craft markets. His biggest problem is putting the right price on the items for sale – usually he under prices his work which means that those who can afford to buy them don’t value them as they don’t cost enough – the snob effect! Luckily we have a new friend who is telling him the right prices for his items so they are selling. So don’t undervalue yourself or your art.
james 6 Jul 2009 @ 2:07 pm
That’s brilliant! He must have a lot of control to not do the lot in his “design phase”. Your support of him is wonderful.
Teresita 13 Jul 2009 @ 12:04 pm
This has been a bless in my day and my life….thank you for sharing your experience. Now I know I am in the right way in my life…studying as an Art Therapist….. It is an excelent tool and a good way to focus all the energy…maybe can be useful for someone….thanks!
Roy 21 Dec 2009 @ 12:42 pm
i love this article and many of these ring true for me. recently i’ve been trying to envision happiness in my meditation and i’ve had glimpses of these ideas there. thanks for sharing :).
Sheri 28 Jan 2010 @ 9:23 am
I too am a Bipolar christian, one who wishes that I had an artistic streak as it might be a way to support myself at a time when SSI is being denied and I have blown up my job history and my credit history. I have been single and raising 3 children for the past 25 years (single again for 14 yrs) and currently require my son to put a roof over my head. Struggling to get a job, struggling with my faith at the moment. Im 47 and my whole world is in TILT mode.
Sheri
Curiosity 18 Mar 2010 @ 8:29 am
What’s interesting is that I created my own list of upsides, then came back here to re-read yours. …And there are a lot more similarities than I would have remembered. I guess maybe some of the positives to depression are universal.
Kimmy 1 Apr 2010 @ 10:33 pm
I too have bipolar and at times I feel as though it is a curse, however I know It has many positive aspects as well. I have been on disability since 03 And during this time I have had the oppurtunity to continue my education. I will be starting a PsyD program in aug of this year. At times I struggle with the ability to work when it is required, but then come back full force and bang out an amazing amount of work. To quote Kay Jamison ” having lived with bipolar I have felt things more deeply; had more experiences, more intensly; loved more and been loved; laughed more often, for having cried more often; appreciated more springs, for all of the winters. Depressed I have crawled on my hands and knees in order to get across a room. But, normal or manic, I have run faster, thought faster, and loved faster than most I know .”
Sara 25 Apr 2010 @ 7:27 am
i was diagnosed with bipolar three years ago. i haven’t had any mania since but almost wish I would that one manic episode felt amazing. just want to see the joy in life again.
Sarah 21 Nov 2010 @ 3:51 am
This is a wonderful piece James. I also feel there are many blessings in having bipolar disorder. For me one of the big ones has been a much needed dose of humility. I especially liked the bit about service :) It is great to have found you and I will be directing others to your site. God bless, Sarah
james 21 Nov 2010 @ 1:07 pm
Thanks Sarah!
Ed Smale 24 Nov 2010 @ 12:42 am
Your list made me smile and laugh – I can relate to a lot of what you have listed. Thanks for posting it!
Avromie 14 Dec 2010 @ 7:59 pm
The best thing about having any illness must be the ability to empathize and help others.
Excellent. I just found your site off Google. Glad I did.
james 14 Dec 2010 @ 8:07 pm
Thanks Avromie!
Kyle 14 Feb 2011 @ 6:23 pm
It sucks being mentally ill. :( I am often ignored by people so I have no friends. I am never able to find the *right* person to connect with that share any of my intrests.
I am all alone in what I like but I am accepting I am not good enough for friends and be thankful for the things I do have like this computer to type on and that I can type period.
Kyle 14 Feb 2011 @ 6:26 pm
P.S If people want to ignore me and miss out on what I can do then that’s their problem.
If people want to subconsciously think I am boring for not going out to parties and other crowded places due to not fitting in then that’s their problem. Not mine.
zeida chaudoin 20 Mar 2011 @ 3:35 pm
I enjoyed reading the 12 good gthings of mental illness. Since I “came out of the closet” I feel relief and can be more of my true self and I found support and friends who understood me better. Some have turned away, but my thought is we are not in the same place in life and we understand differently. I am actively advocating to bring NAMI awareness and education to change stigma. I am comfortable living with Bipolar and ADHD because it gives a certain right to help others like me. thanks for your list. I have my own and I might get motivated to list it.
Jackie Hagan 25 Mar 2011 @ 11:07 am
Fantastic! loved reading this.
I have bipolar and used to abhor myself and my life but over time have come to appreciate (and sometimes adore) the journey of being mad.
I haven’t travelled much but i feel like i’ve been to the moon and back.
I love people who have gone through things that have turned their life upside down, there is a richness and sincerity and humour.
I run creativity workshops for people with mental health needs and am currently helping a group of folk make a book about their stories, I’m running a workshop tomoro about the positives of mental illness and found this website through google. I’ve written a lot about my own journey and mental illness in general, i thought i’d put a link to a poem about ‘us lot’ :)
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/note.php?note_id=32347067403
Jinny 19 Apr 2011 @ 5:49 am
i was just skimming through your text… and it just made me laugh straight away!!! hahahaha. but now i’m gonna go back up and read it again – I’m still having depression. so sick of it ! very boring..can’t even control ourselves.
anyways! love ur text :)
Todd Smith 30 May 2011 @ 5:49 am
How do you help someone with depression seek help? I have a friend who goes through depressed moods every six months or so with a serious depressed state about every 2 years.
I recognize the symptoms as they are similar to my mom’s symptoms when she was depressed. My mom committed suicide about 20 years ago. When she goes through deep depressed states my friend pulls herself into herself to protect herself and others around her. She sometimes won’t communicate with me for weeks, then comes out and things are normal again. She loses many friends at these times.
She has told me many times when she is not in a depressed state that she knows something is wrong, but doesn’t know what. I can’t mention the word depression without her getting upset though.
How can I help her when she won’t communicate with me when she’s depressed and and won’t entertain the thought of seeking help when she’s OK?
Martin 19 Jun 2011 @ 3:47 pm
I’ve got to say, I hadn’t given much thought to the positives associated with mental illness till I read this post.
But thinking about it, one of the positives I can take out of suffering from depression is that it has made me really try to study the way that the mind works. The more I learn, the more I realise that science itself still has a lot to learn. I think that helps me maintain a healthy scepticism about certain treatments.
To Todd Smith (the previous poster): May be you should try sending your friend some links to some good websites that deal with depression. She may say she doesn’t need the info, but she may still check out the sites even if she doesn’t tell you about it it.
I think the toughest steps to take when you have depression is that first one when you seek help. It was certainly a big barrier for me.
Annette 20 Jun 2011 @ 1:02 am
I too know the benefits of having bipolar. Being a Christian and reading the Bible at times I smile when reading about King David he must have been our leader of the Bipolar’s he was so brilliant and inspiration to us all.
My top 12 list of good things about being Bipolar 1. I can multi-task beyond anyone I worked with. 2. I have compassion for others being what I’ve been through. 3. I can turn emotions off and not let people affect me. 4. I pretty much on manic side and accomplish a lot every day. 5. People love my energy I’ve learned to manage it. 6. The ideas that pass through my mind I have learned to hold on to and siege and have promoted programs to help others. 7. Have become a public speaker because of my experiences with bipolar. 8 According to my adult children’s friends I’m the greatest mom ever they love to hang out with me and come to me for advice because I’m an open book even though I’m 55. 9. The grandkids love the crazy concotions I come up with for them, baking together, science projects, you know you can put a hersey’s kiss inside a cupcake and it will keep it’s form. LOL 10. Optimistic, I am uplifting to others they say I’m such an inspiration to them they feel safe in my home, when they’re with me, they say I just give the feeling of nuturing safety that when they’re around me they can do anything. Because I pull out their strengths to be stronger and make their weaknesses strong. 11. I see Bipolar as a gift from God, 12. I can do anything I put my mind to do when raising my kids if something broke down in the home I’d study it, draw a picture of it and stare at it to figure out its being. Then close my eyes sleep on it. And somehow figure out how to repair it on my own. A gift from God Magical problem solving abilities.
Thank You for putting this site together it’s wonderful.
Annette
Alli 23 Jul 2011 @ 11:32 am
Annette! I understand you! That read as if I’d written it : ) I wonder if the experiences we have with the ‘condition’ is more down to our nature types though. I’m a slim energetic woman full of nervy energy, super bright , productive and competant when all is well. Sociable too. A terrible mess on the slumps and then have days where I’m in a trance, unable to work anything out, find the easiest task painfully slow or impossible to undetake. I can’t bearto visit or speak to people but have learnt from holding down full on jobs how to fake it and just about get by on a bad day so hopefully you go under the radar . I have a different ‘head’ on everyday.. I never know how I’ll feel from one day to the next
Mahmud 6 Sep 2011 @ 11:41 pm
Honestly, brother, you’re much more mentally fit than many of those who pretend to be okay when they are not. Wish you a wonderful life.
Hannah 10 Sep 2011 @ 9:02 am
I understand what you’re trying to say but maybe you should have said “my 12 best things about being bipolar” because everyone’s experiences are wildly different and some of your points don’t apply to some illnesses (e.g. someone with social anxiety disorder would have more difficulty than you with the socialising points you mentioned, where you said “I don’t care what I’m going to eat for dinner”, some people with bulimia or anorexia or even things like OCD might have a completely different view of this point and where you said “the best thing about having any illness must be the ability to empathize and help others”, some people with narcissistic personality disorder and definitely people with antisocial personality disorder cannot (or are severely impaired with it) feel empathy. Just some points sorry to be picky :P By the way, good for you that you’re coping so well! I doubt I would with something as serious as bipolar :)
james 10 Sep 2011 @ 6:13 pm
Thank you Hanna. You’re points are very good ones that I didn’t consider when I wrote the post. It’s prompted me to rewrite quite a lot of it – hopefully in a way that is more sensitive to people with other illnesses or with less to sing about in their current circumstances.
Mary 20 Sep 2011 @ 6:08 am
Great to see it from that angle. My husband was diagnosed a little over a year ago and he looks at it as something to be ashamed of as if he has some control over it, as if it is a choice to be bi-polar, I credit part of his feelings to his ex-wife who claimed his illness, he also has ADD, was an excuse and who treated him as if he were less of a man because of it. It bothers me to see this wonderful man suffer anxiety over having to take medications. It is hard for some who suffer such illnesses to not see it as something to be ashamed of yet they do not look down on those that suffer illnesses such as diabetes or cancer. People with mental illnesses have no more control than those with physical illnesses. I am just so proud of my husband for seeking professional help. It is really a relief to know he has a disorder and that he isn’t just a hateful and selfish person.
On a personal note.. I find the Bible’s teaching to be a guide for the fight against depression and the Christian community as a great support system as well…